116 to 69

Thursday, April 01, 2010

This morning before my ultrasound I found myself at Psalm 116 with a very hopeful heart...


Gracious is the Lord, and righteous; our God is merciful
The Lord protects the simple; when I was brought low, He saved me.
Return, O my soul, to your rest,
for the Lord has dealt bountifully with you.
For You have delivered my soul from death,
my eyes from tears,
my feet from stumbling.


After my ultrasound, which showed two lonely follicles (but two, nontheless, I suppose) (another u/s on Saturday afternoon to check the growth/recommend where we go from here), I found myself again with tears, repeating to my weary, scared, and disappointed heart, words of Psalm 69...

But as for me, my prayer is to You, O Lord.
At an acceptable time, O God, in the abundance of Your steadfast love,
answer me.
With Your faithful help, rescue me from sinking into the mire;
let me be delivered from my enemies and from the deep waters.
Do not let the flood sweep over me,
or the deep swallow me up,
or the pit close its mouth over me.
Answer me, O Lord, for Your steadfast love is good;
according to Your abundant mercy, turn to me.
Do not hide Your face from Your servant,
for I am in distress- make haste to answer me.

18 comments:

Jessica said...

I'm sorry you didn't get the number of follies you were hoping for!!

I hope the increased Follistim dosage makes a few more big follies.

((HUGS))

Rach said...

2 good ones are better thant lots of bad ones. Praying more show before the 6th.

Melissa said...

Oh A, I'm sorry about the follies. Know that God hears you. I'll be thinking & praying for you on Saturday.

Al said...

Oh A, I'm so sorry the follies aren't cooperating. I'm hoping and praying Saturday shows much progress!

Katie said...

I am so sorry about the follies, A. I hope the increased dose an a couple of extra days leaves you feeling a little more hopefully.

(((hugs)))

TeeJay said...

I'm sorry you are feeling down. It makes no sense sometimes how our bodies react to stims. I usually got 2 to 3 really good follicles with just clomid so I thought I'd do great with stims. Not so much. But my dosage got figured out and they did get 4 eggs from me at my ER. Hang in there. It's ok to be sad and to cry...you are human. Best of luck to you on Saturday.

Basic Girl said...

I'm so sorry hun, hang in there. Praying some more follies pop out by Saturday! Thinking of you!!

Praying for Hope said...

Two great follicles are better than dozens of mediocre ones. I hope these two are stupendous.

Not that this will happen to you, but I post on a board with a woman who is now 23 weeks pregnant after her 3rd IVF. During the first two, she was on birth control before starting the cycles, and she didn't produce many follicles. In fact, one cycle had to be cancelled. On the last, her RE opted not to do the BCP first to see if she'd respond better. She did, and at 23 weeks, you can guess the results. It's something to consider if you need to go through this again in the future (crossing fingers that you won't).

callmemama said...

Ugh, this sucks. Hang in there, though! I still think there's a chance your levels could improve - there's still time!

JC said...

I'm sorry about your follies. I hope you have a better u/s in a few days. Praying for you. Hang in there.

lowfatlady said...

One is all it takes. I'm hoping I get two to try with this cycle. Good luck!

Ashley said...

I'm sorry you didn't get the news that you were wanting. :( Those verses are beautiful. You are in my thoughts and prayers!

Ashley said...

Don't forget- our God is the God of the impossible! Trust His perfect plan! Praying for you...

Ask or Imagine said...

I'm sorry the results were not what you hoped...but am praying that God works the miracle you desire so much! That is great that you look to Scripture for your highs and your lows...and the Psalms are so good for all emotions!

Hillary said...

Continuing to pray with you my friend. Praying for a few more good follies and for peace in your spirit. (((hugs)))

Ann - Building a Nest said...

I am really hopeful about the 2 great follies (that’s all you need for twins, right?) But I know that feeling of wanting to see the u/s full of potential. Just don’t give up on those lil’ guys. One (or both) just might end up being the baby you’ve been praying for.

ventingvagina said...

i agree with rach! and you never know what could sprout up in time for tomorrow. i'll be thinking of you, hugs.

Stacey said...

I love the way that the Psalms always have comforting words for us. Just want you to know I'm thinking of you and sending hugs.