Being Fickle...

Thursday, April 15, 2010

...aka: When your RE tells you (without you saying first) that he thinks the antagonist protocol is what he'd suggest this time, and that is the only reason you were going to get a second opinion (because you never thought he'd use antagonist), are you allowed to change your mind about getting a second opinion, even if you disagreed with your RE before, but now you are so happy that he is thinking what you're thinking, even though you have no medical basis for it?

Did ya get all that?

So anyway, as you might infer, at my consult this afternoon, my RE proposed (without any suggestion from me) that we do antagonist this time. He also said that if I want PIO (yes), he will prescribe it.

Both of which I "wanted", as Mr. A calls it, but putting it that way makes me feel like a spoiled brat who threw a tantrum until somebody caved into her.

And I only throw tantrums in my house, not the RE's office! HA! Hahahahaha :) Just kidding, of course...I never throw tantrums!!

Mr. A is now leaning towards staying put, now that my RE is willing to change up the protocols. Plus, Mr. A is somewhat of an armchair conspi.racy th.eorist, and so when my RE said that the shared risk programs are ethically controversial in some circles, Mr. A perked up. (Basically, practices only accept women with pretty good chances for success into those programs. And so people with pretty good chances have a better chance of getting pregnant on their first try, which means they just paid $20k for one IVF cycle, because you don't get a refund if you get pregnant once you have paid! And the people who would most benefit from the program (e.g., not so great responders) are not accepted because they are too much of a risk. Go figure! Mr. A said "I knew there was something sketchy about that thing." Ha!)

And I am leaning towards staying put mostly because I really do think this is the protocol for us (in my most uneducated opinion!), and he does seem familiar with it even though he doesn't use it as a first option, and if the other place is going to do the same one, why do the hassle of switching? But the fact that I have heard such great things about the compassionate nurses there is so inviting...

My friend K said that maybe I should go to the other consult because maybe they have seen more people like me. That is definitely possible, but my RE has been practicing for probably close to 30 years, so it's not like he's only done this a few times. (Hence, I think, his devotion to lupron, which has been out for almost as long!) And he said that there are very few people he's cared for who have never gotten pregnant. (I think some did more than 1 IVF/FET, but still, if that is true, that is pretty impressive I think...) But K is very respectful and encouraging and of course says that whatever decision we make, she will be behind us! (You're the best, K, in case you're reading!)

One positive about staying put is that we could start another IVF cycle right away next week (if we wanted to, it's not like we have to) (if I start a new cycle, heh heh). I guess the other place could hypothetically do the same thing, since we have all our testing done, but I'm not sure I could drop right in, not being an established patient and all.

So I just don't know. I'm hoping a positive pregnancy test will make our decision for us ;-) I told you, we are dreaming big!!!

16 comments:

Hillary said...

So glad the appointment went well and you and your RE are on the same page. FWIW, I'm with your friend K on this - it might be good to at least have a consultation with the 2nd RE, and then decide from there. You very will may stay put at the 1st clinic, but at least you've explored the other option and can *know* you're making the best choice.

Of course, I am dreaming big with you that you are currently pregnant and don't need to think about any of this!

Jessica said...

Glad your appointment went well. I say go with your gut. If you are happy with your RE and the new protocol then go for it!!

Anonymous said...

So glad that your RE picked the protocol you wanted. I hope that it works! Huh, I never knew that about the shared risk program. Makes you think.

Hollytraveling said...

I'm happy your appointment went well. I think keeping the consult is a good idea. If nothing else it will reaffirm your faith in your current RE.

Alison said...

I'm happy to hear that you are your RE are now on the same page. I would still go for the consult, just so you know your options. If you don't, you may be wondering "what if" during this next cycle. I think it's reasonable to know what your options are.
BUT, hopefully this won't be necessary! Hopefully a good ole roll in the hay did the trick!

Dear Diary said...

I hope that your dreams come true and you get that BFP soon!!

Leah said...

Of course you have the right to change your mind. :)

I was in the same boat as you. . . about to jump ship, when out of the blue, my RE also suggested the antagonist protocal, which is totally what I wanted! In my case, I responded much better to it than the other protocol I was on.

Basic Girl said...

Well first off I totally hope your decision is made for you very shortly, c'mon au natural BFP!!! But, I think the other consult couldn't hurt...if anything its just more info and a new perspective, and maybe if he says the same thing as your current RE you'll just feel that more confident in staying put? But I am glad your RE changed it up for you, and totally get how it would be easier to stay with him and jump right back into it again!! Keep us posted on what you decide!

AL said...

I'm glad your appointment went well. If it were me, I might just stick with your RE since he's doing the protocol you want and jump right into another cycle, but that's just me. I'm impatient :-).

Good luck with your decision! And hopefully you get that BFP so you don't have to worry about any of this :-)

Rach said...

Yay! Glad things are going your way.

We decided not to do the shared program either. It really only starts to benefit the patient on the 3rd-4th IVF attempt. Thats a lot of cycles!

Praying for Hope said...

I'd stick with this RE for now since he knows you, how you respond, and you odn't need to repeat all the tests, visits, etc. all over again just to set up a baseline of information on you.

Stacey said...

Keep on dreaming big! You never know what might happen. :)

Hoping for a BFP, but if not, I'm hoping you'll have a clear direction on which way to go next. Thinking of you!

Melissa said...

Happy to hear the appointment went well. I honestly have to say, go with your gut. What you feel is best is always the right direction to take.

When are you POAS? Excited and nervous for ya!Praying & thinking of you!

Thankful said...

I love your consistently positive attitude! Keeping you in my prayers.

Anonymous said...

Glad your appointment went well! In some ways I say stay put. They know you already and they are willing to change things. But it also couldn't hurt just to meet with the other RE for another opinion. Even if they want to do the same protocol you might click better with the second office and in my opinion that helps alot! Sorry I'm not much help. :) And yes those shared programs are dumb! I was told your FSH level can't be above 10 for them to accept you in the program. My FSH was 11. So I can't do it. :(

Anonymous said...

i've thought a lot about 2nd opinions, but in the end, i've stuck with my RE. everyone has a different situation, but i trust my RE knows what he's doing and after several months, he certainly knows me really well. switching at this point would be like starting over and i'm not ready to do that. however, it can't hurt to have another opinion, even if you don't switch. go with your gut. good luck! hoping you get a BFP instead of a 2nd opinion though. :)