Just us.

Thursday, December 09, 2010

Boy this Christmas season is wearing me out. I am totally not in the mood, and although I know I have alot to do before my family arrives, I keep putting things off. I am very excited about my family coming, for the most part.

Except that I am worried that it will be a repeat of Thanksgiving, where everyone scatters soon after the big to-do.

One of my sisters lives a half hour east of us. Because our house is bigger (4bd) than their townhouse (2bd), I expected everyone (including them) to come here, get settled into their rooms, and we could stay up every night till midnight drinking egg nog and talking and playing cards.

It doesn't look like that will happen.

Some other members of my family are worried that she will feel less important because no one is staying with them, so they are considering staying with them at least some of the nights they are "here". Well great, I will go to all the effort of "hosting" Christmas and people won't even be here.

I am so excited (in theory) to decorate all their rooms, put out baskets of snacks and water, and really make them comfortable. It would be great if no one had to worry about driving here or there when it is dark and super cold.

In order to include a trip to their house, I've asked if they want to have the Christmas day meal at their place. They have said that will be good! Here is what I'm picturing, after we are done eating Christmas day dinner:

Family: "Okay, well, we are going to hang out here for the next few days."
Us: "Well, alright, we'll just drive home in our lonely car to our empty house that is supposed to be full of family and laughter this Christmas."

Why can't everyone just let us host Christmas this year, and we will all go to their house whatever year they get a bigger one?!

Maybe I am being selfish, but I just can't bear the thought of another disjointed, unfamily holiday. The thought of everyone leaving makes me really sad. Maybe I am being unreasonable or maybe I have my expectations set too high- maybe at some point I will want everyone to go away!

Maybe if we had kids, everyone would want to stay here the whole time. But it's just us.

ETA: My sweet sister called and listened to me cry about this and then reassured me that we will have so much family time, I will begin to go crazy ;-) I will be okay. I can get in the Christmas spirit. I can do this.

Also ETA: It's not that I don't like going to my other sister's place. Their townhouse is very homey and comfortable!! And I am sure our Christmas day dinner there will be awesome!! I am just scared we will all be separated all the time. Am I crazy for wanting tons of time with family? Haha.


brigittemarie said...

Oh don't worry hun! I really don't think that will happen!!!! Knowing our family, I expect some intense together-ness and I'm excited to stay both places :)

Coco said...

Bummer! Hate feeling invalidated like that. I hope everyone stays at your house and that you get a Norman Rockwell Christmas! :)

I'm a little jealous that your family is thinking of staying somewhere else. Haha. I am NOT as good a person as you are. :) But then my family together is more worth of Jerry Spriner than of Rockwell... A little nervous to put all of us together (in my house) for a whole holiday. YIKES!

the misfit said...

Wow, I'd have figured you'd win that one outright on account of having room for everyone. I guess that's the flip side of me figuring that we don't win because we don't have a lot of space. (And, don't have kids. Obviously, this is connected.) Your vision - staying up all night drinking eggnog and playing cards - sounds to me like EXACTLY what a family holiday should be. I even know families who actually have this happen! Unfortunately, it never works out that way in my family. Part of the reason I wanted kids so much was so that we could start over all of the dysfunction and disjointedness that has plagued my family for a couple of generations, and build traditions of siblings and cousins and aunts and uncles and even grandparents spending time together without the hideous family politics. But I guess that wasn't gong to happen...

Anonymous said...

Eggnog and cards! Yeah, that sounds awesome!
You're a sport for offering to do the Christmas meal at their house - I'd have offered Christmas Eve or something like that :). I'm not that nice, though.
I definitely like to be the hostess, and would feel a little let-down too if it ended up just being a quiet night alone after building up the idea of how it should go...
I hope the family surprises you and it ends up being just as wonderful as you imagine!