"You can call me..."

Thursday, September 15, 2011

So on Saturday, Mr. A is going up to help his dad and brother move around some furniture for a project they are working on. His parents' house is about an hour and half away.

When he told me about it, I didn't think anything about it. We've driven up there for day trips countless times; it doesn't even "seem" like a trip at all, really. I even wondered if I should go, if his mom was going to be there, too (it's their second home), but turns out she won't be there.

Last night after dinner, Mr. A goes "Well you know, you can call me anytime on Saturday if anything, like, you know, happens."

Maybe I am just a little dense in the head lately, but it honesty took me a few seconds to realize what he was talking about.

Oh, right. Labor! Haha :)

Almost 2 years ago, I wrote a post about how when you struggle with infertility for so long, the prayer for a child almost becomes abstract and unreal. I mean, of course you are actively praying for a baby, but when your prayer goes unanswered forever, you lose the immediacy and the real-ness of your request. At least sometimes I felt that way. Like, oh sure, I'm praying for a baby, but like that is ever going to happen.

Now that I am almost to the end of this miracle pregnancy, there are still times when I feel like the reality that (God-willing) there will be a healthy baby girl in our arms in less than a month is kind of abstract. We have been preparing for this baby in so many ways for such a long time that, even now that she is almost here, it is hard for me to believe and wrap my head around some days.

Today I'll be praying that we'll all renew the passion that we have about our prayers, especially the ones that have taken on a distant feel, and the power of prayer in general!!


callmemama said...

I can say, even with a baby in our house, it still feels unreal sometimes. I wonder if it's because we didn't have 9 months to prepare and I didn't carry him? Or if it's just such a blessing I still can't comprehend how I could be so lucky!

Deanna: Miss(ed) Conception said...

I can totally relate!!! I was completely in denial that the wonderful pregnancy I was experiencing was actually going to equal a baby. It was all just too surreal. I had no urgency to get the nursery ready or pack my hospital bag. It was a huge upset when I had to be induced two weeks before my due date. What a wake up call! I think I'm still trying to get used to it 6 months later!

the misfit said...

Isn't that interesting. Yeah, I can certainly understand about the abstraction of the prayer. It feels like...praying for a spiritual grace? Rather than a material event? Or something. Which is why it seems totally unconnected to the little HPTs and their uniform single lines.

myjourneythruinfertility said...

"you lose the immediacy and the real-ness of your request"

isn't that the truth! I equate it as a dream- it was one I never thought would come true, so even though it is staring you in the face it is still hard to wrap your head and heart around it.

Trisha said...

It felt unreal for us too; granted our situation was a little different and we only had the 2 weeks to prepare but I still catch myself trying to absorb the "he's our son" part. Praying for you as you guys wait to meet this sweet baby girl!

Anna said...

I had so many moments during my pregnancy that I *thought* it hit me. I had humbling "oh wow this is really happening" moments....but they all paled in comparison to the moment that they put that warm and wiggly baby on my chest. OMG what a moment that was. Can't wait to hear about yours! <3

Lady Grey said...

Wow, so exciting to hear that its so close. Such an amazing answer to prayer. Hope it feels real and exciting and wonderful soon :)

Praying for Hope said...

I felt that way, too. I still do and Kate is nearly a year old. It doesn't feel real yet. At the same time, it doesn't feel like life was ever any other way. That's one benefit of IF. You don't stop being amazed when you have a little one in the picture.