Almost There

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

This week has been pretty busy at work/home/volunteering...thus the lack of posting!! Now it's time for me to catch up on everyone!!

Here is the gist: yesterday I felt like total crap. The second day of a headache, exhausted, impatient, and just a general dragging feeling. When I sit or lay down, it feels like I weigh 800 lbs- like there is this huge force of gravity holding me down. Mr. A had to help one of his buddies move a ginormous fish tank, and in his absence, I fell asleep at 730pm and didn't wake up till 930pm when he called to say he was on his way home. I felt sort of hungry, but nothing really sounded good.

At 13dpo, a girl doesn't take feeling like crap lightly, you know? Nor do I take a temp of 98.61 on 13dpo, and 98.62 at 14dpo (today) lightly, either. (Mind you, I haven't been temping at all, so I have nothing before 13dpo to compare that to, but I was just curious....but when I was temping, I only hit 98.6 once in my whole temping career and it was on 11dpo and it fell like a rock the very next day). And I would like to note that I never got a headache on 9dpo (which had been the norm), and even those past headaches did not last more than an afternoon.

Too bad I had to pee at 3am, so I wasn't sure if it'd be concentrated enough for a positive test at 630am ;-) (Plus I am a chicken anyway. Good excuse for not testing, huh?)

I am really trying hard not to run away with all of these symptoms. It is pretty tough. I have so much hope.

But stupid doubt creeps in and makes me even more worried that even though I feel like this, it's probably just the progesterone supplements, and that the test tomorrow (or Friday, haha) will be negative anyway.

After I spoke at the church on Sunday, this lady comes up to me to sign up to be a volunteer, and she was telling me that before her family moved here, they had looked up our center and wanted to make that part of their lives, and that the previous night, she had laid in bed thinking that she should call our center to get more information, and how, when I spoke about our center the very next morning, all she could think was "Wow, God's timing is so cool."

Yes, yes it is.

Have you ever had one of those experiences? Where all of a sudden everything lines up and works out and is crystal clear and you feel like angels are about to appear in the heaven's? I haven't. I pray that God might bless me with one of those soon (like, you know, tomorrow, when the test is positive!!!). Or even if it isn't positive tomorrow, that we'd be blessed with crystal clear discernment. I want the last line of my testimony about this journey to be "Wow, God's timing is so cool."

I know He won't disappoint.

22 comments:

Emily said...

::Crossing fingers!::

Jeremiah 29:11 said...

Praying for you... and hoping for good results!

callmemama said...

Oh, I hope you get a positive! I'm always so impatient for other people to test, even though I'm not an early tester myself :).

Katie said...

Oh, those sound like great symptoms! Fingers crossed for you. :)

Ann - Building a Nest said...

I like the high temperature A LOT!

Basic Girl said...

Praying for a positive, and hoping that moment is only a day or two away for you!!!

Melissa said...

Those all sound like fabulous symptoms! Praying for a positive!

I've been waiting for one of those moments myself, angels singing, the planets align & everything seems to be perfectly falling into God's plan. Of course, it's HIS timing...but still.

Good luck tomorrow {or Friday!}

Rach said...

Good signs! Good luck tomorrow!

Shanny said...

Those are all good signs, progesterone does give you symptoms but its never kept my temps up, just saying =)
My fingers are crossed tightly for you!!!

suchagoodegg said...

Awesome on the great temp, all sounds GOOD!!! Praying for a BFP for you!!!

Jen said...

Thanks for commenting on my blog!

It does sound like you have some good symptoms going right now. Good luck!

Maybe it says in your previous posting, but why did they switch you back to Clomid again after trying Follistim?

Just curious!

Al said...

O, these symptoms are getting MY hopes up!

Everything crossed for you!

Stacey said...

"I want the last line of my testimony about this journey to be 'Wow, God's timing is so cool.'"

I second that! Love that line. Standing with you in prayer and hope for this cycle, friend!

Lisa said...

Man, it's so difficult not to analyze all those symptoms! Another thing that unless you have gone through infertility yourself, you can't even begin to comprehend. Praying for you tomorrow!

JC said...

Fingers crossed here too!!

AplusB said...

I'm sorry you're not feeling well, but these could be VERY good signs! Fingers crossed so hard for you!!

Hillary said...

Eeeek!! How can you leave me in suspense like that?! :) I know symptoms can very well not mean anything...but I am so darn excited for you. Test test test!

Ashley said...

Crossing my fingers for you!! :)

Leslie said...

I hope that your signs mean great news in just a day away! Lots of + vibes to you! Best wishes!

Jane said...

Those are some nice temps! I'm so jealous! I know how doubts can creep in, though, so hang in there! You will be in my prayers tonight. Good luck!

the misfit said...

I think I've seen that once or twice. Not about IF, though :). I would definitely take something from feeling so different...but then, the hormone pills just throw everything off. How are you supposed to feel with all sorts of weird stuff in your body? Anyway, if you're brave enough to test this morning, you have to update us, OK?

Erica said...

Thinking about you and checking on you first thing this morning! Hugs!