Friday Yet?

Thursday, October 22, 2009

This week is d-r-a-g-g-i-n-g by.....

I have had no headache! Whoa. I'm sure now that I wrote that, I'll get one today. :-P My heart wants to run away with the idea (that follistim+God might have worked), but my head just can't let that happen at this point. I so much want to be like Sew and write a whole joyful post about how I think I might be pregnant, but I just... can't. I think I am a wuss!! But I have had so many other experiences where I see someone proclaiming something (e.g. pregnancy, hearing God), and then I finally get up the courage to be so bold, and I'm wrong! Ha!! See my heart is sort of two-faced about this, on the one hand, it totally feels that baby's on board, but on the other hand, it is pleading for protection from disappointment. My head is left with the impossible job of balancing those!!!

Probably the earliest I'd test is Sunday (14dpo). But I'm thinking I'll probably chicken out and wait till Monday. Not so much that negative tests make me feel sad anymore, but even more than feeling sad, I feel like an idiot for testing in the first place. Ha! Maybe this time I won't feel silly for testing...

I am still feeling more bloated than normal and tired-er than normal in the mornings, but unlike most other 2ww's, I do not feel as tired in the evenings! Bizarro world!! We shall see what God has in store for us- I know He has gone before us and has prepared a path :)

8 comments:

Praying for Hope said...

I wish it were Friday, 4:00. I can't wait for the weekend. I know what you mean about trying to keep unbounded hope in check so you can soften the blow of the inevitable disappointment. One of these days - like now perhaps? - you're bound to be wrong and end up with that BFP. I see what you're doing as preparing for the worst but hoping for the best.

Ann - Building a Nest said...

Very promising indeed!
You're stronger than me. I can't wait to test. I buy tests in bulk and start early. Haha! I'll be thinking about you this weekend (you know, just in case you decide to on Sunday).

TeeJay said...

You are very strong willed to avoid testing. It sounds hopeful that you haven't gotten the headache yet...hope it stays away. Best of luck to you!

callmemama said...

I know what you mean - it seems like every time I post anything that sounds like I think I might be pregnant...it just makes me feel like an idiot when, in fact, I am not pregnant.
Still, I wish you would test early :) (so completely selfish, I know!).

Dea.nna said...

Finding the balance is tiresome! Hang in there. I'm praying you get the BFP. He has prepared a path and that is such an awesome reminder. Fingers crossed for you!

Matt and Jenny said...

i'm praying this is it for you! how wonderful that would be!!! hang in there!

Hillary said...

A, I am seriously praying and hoping this is the cycle God blesses you with a miracle!! Hang in there, I know the end of the tww is TOUGH. ((hugs))

Leah said...

Thinking and praying for you. :-D