Symptoms in Advance

Thursday, June 04, 2009

I think I am already feeling the effects of Cl.omid! Is it seeping out of the blister packs and becoming airborne?!?! Last night Mr. A's dad told us we couldn't leave on Friday because he doesn't think their Pathf.inder will make it home if his brothers have to ride with them. That means Banana will have to spend one more night boarded, which just breaks my heart. I had been so excited to get her on Friday night. So, as if it was a life-or-death situation, I calmly walked into our room and collapsed into tears. Really, I thought to myself? It's not like we board her in an awful place! It is a beautiful family-owned farm and they have great facilities. I miss her, though...

Not to mention, it's not like we are all having the time of our lives (although it is not torture of course), and I am not really looking forward to driving home with Mr. A and his two brothers on CD1 (projected). Furthermore, I don't have any food in the house (since I didn't want to stock up before we left), and I will have to make a mad-dash trip to the store once we get home because Mr. A's family is staying with us for the night before heading home on Sunday.

Here are some other things I desperately flung to God last night as I was falling asleep, because I simply cannot deal with this myself!

*After driving 9 hours home on Saturday, we are supposed to drive 1.5 hours (one way) on Sunday afternoon to my cousin's high school graduation open house
*Monday is a deadline day for me at work, so I have to log in on Sunday night to make sure I don't have anything that came in while I was gone that will be due
*Monday is my first Clo.mid day! Have to remind myself to call my doctor to see if he'll give me a prescription for amox.icilin (however you spell it!)
*Next Saturday, we have a wedding in the morning, and then some friends who moved a couple years ago are coming to visit (overnight) with their baby girl. How am I going to handle that on Cl.omid?
*Must try our best to have good timing cd's 10-13 because we leave on cd13 in the RV for Vermont! Please God let me ovulate on cd14!
*Have to board Banana again while we're gone... :(

I can't believe all of this chaos is ahead of us, but all that allowed me to be calm was thinking that God was always going to help us, He is going to help us, and He will always help us in the future. I don't know what form His help will take, but I know that I can't even begin to overcome all of these circumstances just on my own. I pray He will help us, and it will be clear how He is carrying us, but even if things don't work out perfectly or it seems things are even more wacked out, I have given all of this to Him and I know that He will work this all out for good!!

PS. I read ALOT yesterday, and I'm almost done with Anna Karenina! I have loved it! Sure, it's a long book, but Hillary, you're right that the characters are so real and complex! Plus the story is so tightly and intimately wound! It has been a really great read!


Sew said...

My first month on 50mg of clomid I felt fine. I didn't have any side effects. It was the second time I had side effects.

So you should be okay! And I am very excited you are calling for a.moxicillian! However you spell it! ;)


brigittemarie said...

*HUG* When did this time of year get so so busy?! Hang in there :)

Praying for Hope said...

I don't like leaving my girls either. I get so excited to see them when we come back home. In all honestly, they probably don't realize that an extra day has passed. Banana will just be happy to see her mom and dad again.

the misfit said...

Doesn't it seem like everything's happening right now? When I was a kid, vacation was either exciting or boring. It's only now that I'm an adult that it's just EXHAUSTING. How did that happen?

Hillary said...

Wow, you do have a lot coming up! I hope the transition from vacation to that long list goes smoothly for you!

Oh, and I am so glad you're loving the book!

Becky said...

I am praying for God to strengthen and encourage you with all you have coming up. I think it is totally okay to cut yourself some slack during IF treatments and say no to the things you are able to. I did that during my IVF cycles and it really helped me a lot.